Wanted — Creative Writer


Position open for woman-man, senior-child, good-bad, lovable-hateful, murderer-saint, who is in touch with all the opposites in herself or himself.  Must Help Wantedbe crazy.

Share in our fantastic benefits.  The more you write, the more you will know yourself.  As you struggle to write down your ideas, you will think more about who you are.  You will lead the quiet/exciting life of self-discovery.  AND – as an added bonus – you will feel a sense of creation, a sense of joy when you write your thoughts in a beautiful way.

Discover Aristotle’s cure for psychological ills.  “Art eases tension and heals the soul.”

No experience necessary.  However must be able to type at least one word a minute.

Must begin immediately.  WRITERS WRITE.  If there is not enough time to write and read this book, forget this book.  Writers write.  They learn to write by writing.  Going to courses, reading books, attending lectures, joining writing clubs – all these activities help.  But there’s only one way to become a writer.  Write.  That’s the MOST IMPORTANT RULE OF WRITING – WRITERS WRITE.

Pay:  Little or nothing at the beginning.

Hours:  Many – stolen from other jobs, responsibilities, sleep etc.

Problems: Writers face poverty, alcoholism, suicide, super-inflated egos.  You must come to this occupation with a sense of humor, a belief in your own worth, and the proceeds from your winning lottery ticket.

Qualifications: We’re looking for the person who can listen to their critics and learn from them, yet all the while ignore those critics and believe in themselves.

Further the person must know the myriad rules of writing

and must follow/ignore them.

Forbidden Words:

The person must never say the words ONLY or JUST, as in “I’m only a beginning writer.”  or “I’m just starting.”   Believe you are a writer and you will become one.  We want the person who thinks success comes, not from New York or Hollywood or Toronto, but from one’s own heart.

To obtain this position – do not submit resume, do not fill out application blank.  Go home and write, write,  write.


22 responses to “Wanted — Creative Writer

    • Wow. Are you fast. I just posted that. No, not a motivational speaker. I teach creative writing in a suburb of Vancouver, BC and I teach the same course in a local prison. I started teaching in Wisconsin.

      I like your site, Kim-Lee. It’s clean and attractive and I like your determination to BE a writer


      • (smiles) I happened to check my email just as you posted this! Well, nice to hear–sounds like you’re no ordinary teacher. I definitely like your style of presenting.
        Thank you for the compliment on the site! I certainly try to keep it looking good. And, quite frankly, I like yours too. No gimmicks, easy to read. Good stuff!

  1. No experience necessary? Really?

    You make it sound like all you have to have is the desire to write and blamo, you’re a writer. It doesn’t work that way, sorry.

    You wouldn’t stick someone in a kitchen and say, well, you have the DESIRE to bake a cake, and I know you know nothing about baking, but you should be able to figure it out because you WANT to. Uh, no.

    If you want to be a writer, you’d better be prepared to work damn hard. I’m not saying you need to go get an MFA (although that process does seem to work well for a lot of writers) or go join a writer’s circle (again, that seems to help people) but you’d better be prepared to not just write but to HONE A CRAFT.

    In order to do *that* you don’t just sit down and start writing stories, you read a ton of other people’s work, you read books about the craft, you engage with other writers, you build your vocabulary, you understand how to check facts in your stories, and you do all manner of other things that are necessary to become a writer.

    I wrote a post on my blog a while back called “Why Should You Keep Writing” (http://cdeminski.wordpress.com/2011/05/15/why-should-you-keep-writing/) which covers a similar idea to what you have above, but I stated it in the negative. Meaning…you probably write because you are compelled to do so and nothing is going to stop you, including all the obstacles you may find in your path along the way.

    Just my 2 (and a half!) cents.


  2. People love to leave their “two and half cents” but what works for one doesn’t always work for another. Thanks for yet another encouraging article Ed. You’re the best instructor I’ve ever had the opportunity to learn from. I’ve never checked with other writers. I don’t believe you need an extensive vocabulary. Check facts? Where do you check facts for fire breathing bats, water dragons or flesh eating horses? I believe you need passion and faith in yourself, something that you inspire heartily Ed because if writing and writing and writing isn’t enough to call yourself a writer then I guess I’d better stop.

  3. Amen! I’ve witnessed you inspire people who never dreamed of writing to become writers. Belief in oneself kindles desire and self-discipline. The rest follows.

  4. Humourous, inspiring post. What people have to remember is that a great teacher inspires his students to try, to go to places for themselves that they’ve only dreamed of. Concentrating on the difficult aspects of the work and the effort required to get there would cause many of us to stop before we start.

    I don’t think any reasonable person would think they’d write a Pulitzer Prize winner right out of the shoot nor would I think any reasonable person would think that is what you are saying in this post. When inspiring, no point focusing on the negative. That’s for agents and editors.

    Writing is for everyone not the elite few as Gardner would have us believe. Pick up your pen. Write your stories as best you can. Learn from your story. What works and doesn’t work for your reader. Try to write a better story each time you write and you will succeed in being the best writer that you can be. Trial and error can get the job done in the kitchen and at the desk. Above all enjoy the journey.
    Just my dime’s worth of thoughts.
    Thanks for the inspiring words.

    • You have a good point David, about not wanting to stop someone before they start and I agree with that. But I’ve known writers that get very frustrated with the process too, and many of them are already accomplished.

      Perhaps it’s better to show aspects of both sides of the coin. Or, it depends what it is you want out of the process. If you are writing a story to share with family and friends, or for yourself, it doesn’t have to be perfect. But if you plan to try and publish your work, it makes sense to have the person understand that a certain quality level is required to make the work acceptable.

      I’m a reader for a journal online, and you can imagine the stuff I see day to day. Some folks don’t even bother to spell check their TITLES, never mind the content of their stories before they submit their work and take up the time and attention of volunteer readers and editors.

      I realize what I’m saying isn’t the “easy answer” but I see it from both sides.

  5. Thanks for the shot in the arm, everyone. Got some good writing ideas here and Ed, you have my humble gratitude for your eternal dedication to helping others “find” their pen and keep it moving. I am nowhere in terms of anyone famous or noted in the writing world but I live to write as I live to breathe. My pen (figuratively) still moves because of sparks like you.

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