Sometimes the author has a way of poking herself or himself into the story. It ruins things. You’re going along in Dakota’s head as he tries to rescue a beautiful woman from the clutches of Bad Bill.
“Don’t move, Dakota, this ain’t no toy gun.”
Dakota didn’t have a weapon of any kind. But courage and creativity were part of him. He faked a move to the left and…
Of course that’s author intrusion. But what about a simple adjective? Later in the story, Bad Bill has shot Dakota. Bad Bill put his foot on Dakota, a triumphant gesture for all in the bar to see.
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